Good afternoon, evening, morning or [no time zone specified], dearest readers! I,
Jon Ola Sand Pix1001, am delighted to be here today in my role as Executive Co-Supervisor of The Video-Games Broadcasting Union™ to announce their most flamboyant and extravagant event to date: Blogovision!
Yes, that’s right good people of this and other universes, there is a new show in town brought to you by the debonair-extraordinaires who delivered High Score Haute Couture: The Gaming Catwalk 2018 to your screens – Pix1001 and Chris from OverThinker Y
Despite last year’s event being a tremendous success, attempts to bring it back for a second year were thwarted by a backstage fight that broke out between the contestants upon its conclusion. I am sorry to say that this altercation led to both the loss of the trophy and the rescinding of the organisers’ event licenses under a little-known clause in the contract called ‘crimes against fashion’.
But this injustice couldn’t keep us down! Oh no! You can’t stop FABULOUS, and now myself (that’s Pix1001 to you) and the marvellous Chris (whose fabulous introduction to this event you can (and should) read here!) are back with a new show, which hopes to be even bigger, even better and even more dazzling than anything seen before. The video-gamification of culture is now well and truly underway and what better cultural institution could there be to give the video-game treatment to than The Eurovision Song Contest (!!)
So then, without further ado, it gives me great pleasure to present to you:
Blogovision 2019: A Community Event
*riotous canned applause and significant flag waving*
Ok, calm down! I know that this is exciting but you’re just going to have to quieten down to let me explain what it is and how you can get involved.
For our friends in other parts of the world who may not have heard of Eurovision, it can be described as follows:
Eurovision is an international song competition held primarily among the member countries of the European Broadcasting Union (and, er, Australia). Each country chooses an original song to represent them which is then performed live on TV (normally with much hoo-ha), and is then voted on by all the other competing countries.
So that’s Eurovision, but what is Blogovision?
Well, in simple terms, Blogovision replaces Eurovision’s ‘countries’ with ‘video games’. So instead of being able to strategically cast your vote for Ireland every year, this time you will be able to vote for a video game.
But Pix! Which video games will compete in the Blogovision Song Contest? Well, that’s where you come in…
To help me explain, I’m going to hand over to one of our very talented commentators for the event, from the renowned Eyes of the World news team, here’s……BAYONETTA.
“So, Bayonetta, what do you make of Blogovision 2019?”
“Oh my, what do we have here? Isn’t this all a little bit trifling? I mean, a song contest featuring video game characters? If they can’t even beat me in Smash then there isn’t really any hope for them, but hey, you are paying me rather handsomely to do this…speaking of which, would it not make sense to get a professional journalist to do this? I’m sure there’s one around here somewhere…Cheshire? CHESHIRE!? I know you’re hiding here somewhere! Damn it! That man is never here when you need him! Ok, ok I’ll do it…”
“Er…thanks Bayonetta. Could you get on with telling the audience what they have to do please?”
“Oh yes. Fabulous. Thank you Pix and welcome to this, the announcement party for Blogovision 2019. Party? Wait! I didn’t know I was going to a party! Where’s Jeanne? She borrowed my best hat!?”
“Sorry about that, onto the matter at hand…so yes, Pix has asked me to tell you all about Blogovision!”
*reads studiously from script*
“Blogovision is a star-studded show, similar to the real-life Eurovision Song Contest in which countries, or in this case, video games, enter participants to put on an all-singing all-dancing show, hoping to be good enough to win the most votes from the audience and take home the crown of Blogovision Champion 2019.
Hmmm, I think Rodin might be up for this…he does a pretty good rendition of ‘Fly me to the Moon’.
Anyway! Back to this rather dull script… *Adjusts glasses*
In order to put on this show we need your help!
We need YOU, the bloggers of the world, to let us know which characters from which video games you want to compete in the show.
To do this, you simply need to write a blog post explaining who they are, which game they will be representing and telling us a bit about the type of show they would perform at Blogovision. Maybe they play a particular instrument or have a great voice? Maybe they have a penchant for opera or power metal? What on earth will they wear? All the details are up to you!
Entries must be submitted by May 10th and will then be compiled by the organisers. One week later, on May 17th, the grand final featuring your contestants will be broadcast around the blogosphere from Shoot the Rookie and OverThinker Y. As is customary, voting will then take place before the overall winner is announced on Friday, May 24th.
The organisers will take care of the venue, the hosts and the broadcast of the final itself, but we need you to submit your contestants or there won’t be any show at all! So turn your fabulometer up to 11 and get writing!
Right! Is that it? I’m off to find that hat in time for the big show!”
Thank you to the always charming Bayonetta for that explanation. Just in case you didn’t quite catch what she was saying, or were distracted by her attire, here is a quick recap:
What? Write a blog post describing the video game character/s you want to enter into Blogovision 2019 and tell us which game they will be representing.
Please Remember: Link back to this post so we don’t miss your entry. Each game can only appear once in the final, so if you want to make sure you bag the game of your choice please let me or Chris know asap what you have chosen.
When? Submissions must be received by May 10th. Latecomers may be accommodated but the Video-Games Broadcasting Union™ can’t make any promises.
What will happen next? Your contestant/s will take part in the final show, broadcast by Shoot the Rookie and OverThinker Y on May 17th. Don’t forget to tune in!
Who wins? The audience will be able to vote for a winner at the end of the May 17th show and the winner, and recipient of the title Blogovision Champion 2019 will be announced on May 24th.
So have all the viewers at home got that? I sure hope so! I’m pretty excited to find out who you are going to submit as your contestants! If you have any queries please do not hesitate to contact one of the organising committee.
Lines are now open so let us know what you are doing to celebrate Blogovision below, and remember to get your entries in by May 10th! Thank you for reading, and make sure to check out Chris’s introductory post over on OverThinker Y, as it is bound to contain better puns than this one *winks*.